(Coming some day, when the tariff war ends.)
First, find an excuse to not show up for work today. Something your boss will find plausible, of course.
Next, figure out what you’re going to actually do with all that sweet, sweet freedom.
You’ll need some cash, shelter, transportation, and food while you’re slacking.
And finally, pick up some bonuses. A semi-dedicated worker-ish like you probably deserves a bonus.
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